There are many movies and songs that talk about the one that got away, but rarely do we hear what happens when they come back. Sure, there used to be a time when the only way a past love would make a return was if by some stroke of luck you end up running into that person in your hometown. However with social media, ultra-mobile people, WhatsApp and FaceTime, it’s gotten pretty easy for the one that got away to make a comeback.
But before you welcome them back into your life with open arms, keep in mind some of the very possible outcomes:
- They could be exactly where you left them, physically and/or mentally.
Remember that wonderful summer fling you had in summer 2012? What about that person you always had a complicated relationship with during your college years? Would the current version of yourself still feel attracted to that person if they hadn’t evolved one bit since the last time you saw them? Do you really want that same sophomore in college who still attends every college party he/she can find rather than finding a job?
Hands of young beautiful woman practicing yoga at home.
- They could leave the same way they did the first time around
That guy who was afraid of commitment three years ago probably still drags his commitment issues around with him, and may still be hesitant to get into a relationship with you. That girl who never considered you boyfriend material probably won’t change her mind about you, regardless of how much of a catch you’ve always been. And that guy who ghosted you a few months ago? He’ll likely take for granted the fact that you let him make a comeback, and just ghost you again because he can’t fathom the possibility of you being the one who rejects him.
- They can become the person you always wanted them to be… and still not be right for you.
People change and evolve, and sometimes that person you had high hopes for turns into exactly everything you always wanted them to be. However, that doesn’t mean they’ve changed their mind about you, and you may have to stop and think that you may have changed yourself. Be prepared to have that opportunity to be with the person you’ve imagined for years, only to find this isn’t actually what you want anymore.
- You realize that most of the things you thought they were, were not real
The thing about the one that got away that makes that person so intriguing is that they leave so many blanks and “what ifs” for you to fill in with your own fantasies, hopes and expectations. It’s like going to see a really good movie and leaving 20 minutes before it ends — there are so many possibilities of what could have happened. What would that magical ending have looked like? But reality has no interest in your plans, and more often than not, doesn’t measure up to our desires.
- Maybe you’ll live happily ever after
Hey, you never know. Sometimes, timing really is everything.